Russia’s Robots Are So Futuristic They’re Humans

https://twitter.com/Soviet_flag/status/1072750313692631040

Russia is doing some shit and I know it seems like this is just Russia making people think they have no robots, but by doing this it solidifies one things: Russia has some crazy robots in their arsenal. For those of you who can’t read Russian, the above caption says “Russian Robot does Macarena and whole crowd goes wild. This Robot will destroy an entire civilization in 16 days.” My Russian is a little shaky but I’m pretty sure that’s what it says and when I say I’m pretty sure, you know I don’t know shit about that gibberish. If I was in that Russian room of terror I would of been shaking with fear of this robot sending out five mini missiles like Tony Stark. One second he’s doing the Macarena, the next, he’s charging up his hand cannons ready to blow anything out of the water. 

https://giphy.com/gifs/iron-man-dfJ0ns8LBXNni

However, in a shocking turn of events, this robot isn’t a robot at all and the population of Russia has never played a game of chess in their lives. Just checkers and more checkers over there. 

https://twitter.com/Newsweek/status/1072952983262912512

Yeah, that’s right, Russia is just dressing people up like robots and acting like they have some sort of godly technology. I have to say, I’m impressed with their diligence in attempting to hide the fact their robots are just humans. With that being said, the photo of the guy getting ready to act like a robot is very staged. Russia has to be throwing this out there, setting their whole country up to look like dingbats only to reveal they have a fleet of hulk sized Iron Men ready to rip the barrels off guns and flip tanks. At this point in the robot saga, I’m almost over the inevitability of us getting dominated by these metal creatures. Best case scenario is that the robots are like this and they just rip us apart instead of having big computer brains and making us their slaves as they try to contact another computer in a far off galaxy. Wow, huge turn of events in my brain and now robots are contacting aliens to have them come here and save them from humans. Definitely could see robots doing this and someone should notify Elon Musk to see if any of his distant brothers on Mars have heard anything in the radio waves. Going forward, if you see a “robot” try and pull of his head, might be a human under there. 

https://giphy.com/gifs/old-play-NWlBEcDW5evFS

Twitter: @BostonConnr

Instagram: @BostonConnr

Stan Lee, Dead at 95

It’s a sad day in the Marvel Universe as Stan Lee, the creator of so many of our favorite superhero’s, is dead at 95.

https://giphy.com/gifs/reactionseditor-3o7btT1T9qpQZWhNlK

Stan Lee dying is awful. Nobody wants to see a guy who’s had an impact on such a massive franchise to go anywhere. With that being said, Marvel is going to be fine, the movies are still going to be unreal, and even without Stan Lee’s cameo’s, I think the films will survive. Speaking of, Stan has been making cameos in movies since the 80s so here are five that will be ranked accordingly after the fact. 

The Amazing Spiderman

Stan Lee had noise canceling headphones before anyone did

Iron Man 3

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Ant Man

Michael Pena voicing over Stan Lee, always awesome

Guardians of the Galaxy  Vol. 2

I enjoy all of Stan Lee’s cameo’s which is why these are all evenly tied for fifth or first, whatever floats your boat. To a legend, thank you for the Marvel Universe. It’s something enjoyed by people of all ages and will continue to be watched all over the world. 

RIP Stan Lee. 

@BostonConnr