Weight Loss Competition Update

I will be coming on here from time to time to give you a little behind the scenes perspective on the current weight loss competition. My thoughts on how I am doing plus my thoughts on the other competitors. 

My current mood is this 


2 days in and I have woke up at fucking 6am each day to go to the gym and workout. Not just any workout. Fitness Guru Cory Gregory is putting me through the workouts on his website that are destroying me. Try not doing any workouts for like 8 years and then jumping in 100%, my muscles don’t have a clue what is going on. I assume they think it’s some sort of apocalypse because that’s the only reason I would be doing this much activity. I cried a little this morning when I sat down to take a shit. Felt like I had a 4 inch blade stuck directly into my quad. Do not worry though bettors, I will keep going. I am currently on a strict meat and vegetables diet that I did not enjoy for my first meal but then Fuego Box hooked us up with some low calorie hot sauces that made it so much better. Seriously they are good. FuegoBox.com/America. I can’t tell you how well its going today because we have a weigh in tomorrow but I can feel the pounds falling off. We will be going live tomorrow for the weigh in. 


Now on to the competition. 

Fucking Zito. He’s doing the same thing he did last time. He eats one salad at some point during the day. There is obviously no rhyme or reason to why he is doing what he’s doing. He ordered a salad yesterday from fucking Hooters. What? Don’t even try to wrap your head around “hey, ill order a salad from Hooters… that sounds good.” You can’t get into the brain of a human like that. He literally ate like a grizzly bear for 6 months preparing for this hibernation and will not eat anything until the competition is over. His strategy is starvation and Hooters salads. There will be no working out from Zito. Unbelievable human. 


Todd is a liar. Todd claims to have lost this incredible amount of weight after literally 24 hours but then when he gets on the scale in the office goes “Oh my scale at home might be off.” Not all scales are created equal and that’s the type of thing I expect from a rookie competitor like Todd. Todd of course ate sausage and cucumber yesterday for lunch because he is a huge fan of things shaped like dicks. Wouldn’t be surprised if he was eating them through his ass. Don’t think he’s working out either because he keeps telling me I am going to gain too much muscle. I don’t trust what he is going to be doing at the Low T center. Kinda worries me. 

Last and certainly not least is Tim McAfee. Honestly I think my number one competition. He is all in on Keto. But not like the eat a bunch of meats Keto. This guy had like 2 pieces of Bacon for lunch after fasting for 48 hours like some sort of weight loss highlander. He also used to do triathlons so I assume he’s at home just triathloning all the fucking time. My hope here is that his 20 extra years has slowed his metabolism greatly. 


You can still bet on all of this at MyBookie.Ag

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