Sky News – Mark Roberts (53) of Sefton Park, Liverpool claims to have streaked 568 times across 24 countries, with only 25 of them resulting in an arrest.
Usually, when we think about streakers we picture the blackout-wasted idiot who doesn’t think it’s a party unless you wake up in the drunk tank. But this isn’t the case. This guy is a pro. Mark Roberts says he’s a performance artist and he takes his art very seriously.
Roberts says he respects the event and the athletes that are competing so he never interrupts the game. Instead, he waits for an obvious break in the action before he puts on his show. With only 25 arrests out of 568 shows, I’m guessing he puts on a pretty good show. So, 22 out of 23 times the powers that be were like “Ok, that was funny.”, then showed him to the door instead of tossing him in a wagon.
I don’t mind a good streaker. By that I mean, if you’re going to do it, don’t just run around naked and make a bunch of out of shape security guards chase you for 30 minutes. Put on a show! Entertain us. If you’re going to enter the game naked, I need the game to be more entertaining because you entered the game naked. Think themes.
If you ‘re going to run across the fairway at a PGA event, strap a “tiger” club head on your rod. If it’s a Notre Dame game, wear a priest collar. If it’s the opening ceremonies for the Olympics, light your dick on fire. You get it. Be creative! It appears Mark Roberts is that guy but does that mean everyone is going to enjoy his performance?
Mark is a father of three. That’s unfortunate. That can’t be easy for the kids. The odds of at least one of these kids falling in love with heroin is pretty high. But I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, just because you’re a parent that doesn’t mean you have to stop chasing your dreams.
You do you Mark Roberts! I’d be honored to see your naked ass put on a show at Lucas Oil Stadium.