I love a good action flick. It’s my go-to genre to watch when I finally lay down for the night. Action movies are easy to consume because I don’t have to use my brain a lot. There’s not a lot of twists and turns, no complicated story lines, just one badass main character running around and fucking up a bunch of bad guys in the coolest ways imaginable. That’s my shit. Here’s a list of my Top 10 Badass Movie Characters of All-Time.
10. Doug MacRay in The Town. This is my favorite Ben Afleck performance and movie to date. Doug MacRay is a South Boston town and former NHL goon that washed out of the league for a pain pill addiction. Then moves back home to join the family business, which is robbing armored cars. This is one of the best back stories for a movie badass ever. At the heart of it all, Doug is a good dude but when push comes to shove, he’ll bury you if you get in his way. This movie ends with the best shootout scene since Heat. I’ll even to say its better because everyone screams in a Southie accent.
9. Leon in The Professional. Leon, played by Jean Reno couldn’t read and write but as a hitman, he was a savant. He ends up taking in the neighbor girl, Natalie Portman, after her family is murdered by dirty DEA agents. At the end, the dirty DEA agents learn she’s still alive and come after her which pits Leon in a war against them and like 3 NYPD Tactical Units. I love this movie and I love this character so much that I don’t even care that he’s French.
8. Benjamin Martin in The Patriot. Benjamin Martin, played by Mel Gibson, leads the Colonial Militia against British Forces after the murder of his own. This dude was a vet of The French and Indiana Wars and was well-versed in hit and run, guerrilla type tactics so he was not to be fucked with. He wanted to stay out of the war but then some British dude killed his son for no reason and took his other son prisoner, so Ben grabbed a knife and a tomahawk and slaughtered an entire British column. After that he basically win the Revolutionary War all by himself.
7. Butch Coolidge in Pulp Fiction. I think this is my favorite Bruce Willis character of all-time because it was the first time we got to see him bald. Butch Coolidge was an aging boxer who took a bunch of money from Marcellus Wallace to throw his last fight of his career. Instead, Butch bets all the money on himself and beats his opponent so bad that he dies. Butch wins a shit ton of money, Marcellus puts a hit out on him, Butch kills the hitman and then literally saves Marcellus’ ass by killing two white-supremacist with a samurai sword. Then he rides off to Vegas on a chopper with his lady.
6. Hoot in Black Hawk Down. Hoot fucks. Played by Eric Bana, Hoot was by far the smoothest member of Delta Force in this movie. When the shit goes bad and the bullets start flying, this is the guy you want next to you. He gives a speech to Josh Hartnett’s character toward the end of the movie that will make you want to run through a wall. I’ve seen this movie 4,769 times and it’s all because of my boy Hoot.
5. Gunnery Sgt. Bob Lee Swagger in Shooter. He edged out Hoot because he was a Marine. Mark Wahlberg brought the heat in this role. A marine sniper who was left for dead by his commanding officer and then retires to a quiet life in the mountains with his dog. Then the CIA brings him out of retirement to help catch a sniper that wants to kill the president, they end up framing Swagger for the attempt so he has to show them all what one motivated marine and his rifle can do. OOOOOOOOH-RAAAAAAAAH!
4. Jason Bourne in The Bourne Supremacy. Another Marine who gets fucked over by the government. Matt Damon plays David Webb, who gets recruited as a Forced Recon Marine, to participate in some highly classified government program. They erase his memory, brain wash him, change his name to Jason Bourne and train him to be the deadliest assassin in the world. He starts to get his memory back, they try to take him out, he kills a bunch of lesser Jason Bourne dudes and dismantles the whole operation. This movie and the sequels with Matt Damon are sick! The best car chase scenes in the business, the music at the end is the coolest music to ever take a movie to credits and Matt Damon can throw some hands son!
3. Bryan Mills in Taken. This role made Liam Neeson a household name. And for good reason. Bryan Mills’ daughter went to France with her friend Amanda who was the dumbest girl on the planet and a giant ho. She tries to hook up with a dude they meet at the airport. He works for a network of Albanian sex traffickers who end up abducting them. Bryan flies to France, locates his daughter and murders every Albanian in France within 17 hours of the abduction. It’s incredible! Then he gets his wife murdered in the sequel. But we get to see him murder all the Albanian sex traffickers that weren’t in France so that’s awesome!
2. John Wick in John Wick is the poster child of action flicks. The movie itself is the template for what all action movies should be. The people that made this movie in no way wanted you to have to use your brain. They even titled it with the main character’s name so you know exactly what you’re getting before you even watch it. What’s this movie about? John Wick, that’s what it’s about! Want more John Wick? Rent John Wick 2! This movie spends 1 minute and 37 seconds to explain that John Wick recently lost his wife and that she was the reason he retired from killing people for a living. Then some dudes break into his house and kill his dog which immediately fuels the most epic 90 minute slaughter-fest ever to make it to the big screen. It was like someone gathered up the most creative minds in the movie industry, got them high for a week and had them write down all the coolest ways they could think of to kill a bad guy. And then they made it a movie! This is the Keanu Reeves I’ve always wanted.
1. John Rambo in First Blood and the 4 Rambo movies that followed. I’ve been following this guy since 7th grade and he’s still at it so he’s my #1. Sylvester Stallone is John Rambo, a Vietnam vet who went to visit his buddy after the war in a small mountain town that had a Sheriff who didn’t like guys with long hair. So, he arrested John and they beat the shit out of him. He broke out, stole a motorcycle, hid in the woods and started taking out every redneck lawman dumb enough to follow. He went to prison for that but the CIA got him out to show them where the Vietnamese prison camps were in Rambo: First Blood. He did and found there was still POW’s there, but the CIA wanted to leave them so Rambo saved them all, burnt down the camps and then killed all the CIA guys. In Rambo 3, his old Colonel found him years later in Thailand and talked him into going to Afghanistan. I don’t remember why but he killed everyone there so that was another good one.
Then in Rambo (2008) he was finally living a quiet life in Burma giving river boat rides to people. He gives a ride to some missionaries and they get kidnapped by rebels. So he rescues them and kills every rebel in Burma in what was the most graphic of all the Rambo movies. He literally shoots a man to pieces with a vehicle-mounted .50 caliber machine gun and then does a throat rip with his bare hands. Speaking of throat rips, Dalton from Roadhouse was my #11. Rambo V comes out in 2019. He’s like 90! Maybe he’ll declare war on Medicare. That would be awesome.